Facing divorce? Four tips to get through it

Every divorce is different. It is often complicated and difficult – but it can also be a transition to a new you.

Whether you are going through it yourself or supporting a loved one who is, we are here to help you find the information you need to navigate the process. Here are some tips to help you or a loved one through a divorce.

1. Get organised

No matter where you are in the process, a crucial step is to organise and consolidate all your financial information. Start by listing all your accounts: bank accounts, investments, retirement, credit cards, mortgages, and any other loans. Next, do the same for all your sources of income.

Then gather documents for everything, including account statements, pay stubs, tax returns, and more. If it pertains to money, collect it for your records. It is better to have too much information than not enough. Having this information can help you with any negotiations and help you feel more empowered and in control of your situation.

2. Familiarise yourself with the legal process

Divorce/separation laws vary by country. Culture, religion, and societal norms all influence how divorce and separations are viewed and treated.

In some countries, assets are divided equally, potentially considering things such as how long the couple were partnered/married, and the financial contribution each made during the marriage/partnership. In other locations, separation/divorce may involve an arbitration or mediation process where the split of assets is negotiated and agreed between the couple.

Child custody and support can be particularly complex and emotional issues in divorces/separations. Child support payment issues can cause financial strain and impact children’s well-being.

It’s important to take professional legal advice to ensure that understand the required steps and, if necessary, have legal representation to help guide you through the process and represent your interests.

3. Surround yourself with trusted ones

It is easy to feel alone during a divorce. Make sure to surround yourself with people you trust—including professionals but also friends and family—who you can lean on for support.

You may find you need a legal adviser, mediator, or both to help you with the divorce process. A financial professional can help you understand where you are right now, and also how any choices or negotiations you are considering could impact you in the future. If you and your soon-to-be ex-partner own a home or other real estate (either separately or jointly), you may also consider consulting a realtor or property appraiser.

Emotional support can be as important as financial and legal support. Do not be afraid to reach out to friends and family, or to consider working with a therapist. This is a time to ask for help.

4. Start planning for the rest of your life

Divorce is often filled with uncertainty—your finances are changing, your home life is changing, and it can be hard to picture your future. One thing you can do to help yourself feel more in control is to start planning for what your finances will look like after your divorce. You can alter that plan as your life changes, but having a financial plan for the future can help give you comfort. This can prove difficult to do alone, so consider connecting with a financial professional to help you chart your course.

5. Take care of yourself

This one, although the simplest, may feel like the hardest to prioritise: Be kind to yourself. Make sure to continue to do the small things that make you happy and contribute to your wellbeing. Take care of yourself physically, emotionally, including finding time to connect with people you love.

Some people may find divorce to be one of the most challenging experiences of their lives. Do whatever you need to do to feel grounded and centred in a time when everything may seem confusing.